Overview of the path to Matching & Blessing

We have outlined 10 basic steps to guide parents and children through the matching process. Details about every section you can read in our online Matching and Blessing Guidebook.

1) PREPARATION

Parents and child prepare for matching

INTERNAL:

  • focus on developing the parent-child relationship
  • discuss the concept of matching and Blessing, expectations and limitations
  • study blessing/marriage preparation literature – the Matching and Blessing Guidebook (parents and children together if possible)
  • make conditions

EXTERNAL:

2) SEARCH

How will we find potential candidates?

3) CONTACTING A FAMILY

When you find a candidate that you are interested in, you can contact the other family by email, by phone, in-person, through a matching supporters or the national BFD leaders.

Discuss thoroughly with the other family, make conditions, TAKE YOUR TIME to do this.

4) INTRODUCTION OF CANDIDATES

We suggest timing be carefully considered and that the process not be rushed.

5) INITIAL COMMUNICATION PERIOD

We recommend a period of initial communication, approximately 21 days, to consider whether to enter into a formal matching process.

6) MATCHING PROCESS & DEEPER COMMUNICATION (“Heavenly courtship”)

After communicating thoroughly, the candidates should decide if they wish to become a matched couple. We recommend a time period of 7 months as a guideline.

7) COMMITMENT

Submit matching papers. The two candidates can organize a “Commitment (engagement) ceremony” together with their families.

8) PREPARATION FOR BLESSING (internal & external)

Make conditions, prepare Blessing offering, travel etc. while living as brother and sister; developing a deeper understanding of one another and friendship.

9) COSMIC BLESSING

Attend the Blessing Ceremony and receive the Blessing.

10) LIFE AS A BLESSED COUPLE

Investing in your Blessed Marriage and starting your sexual relationship as Husband and Wife. Couples should have a minimum of 40 days separation period after the Blessing.